Operator : "Thank you for calling Pizza Hut. May I have your..."
Customer: "Hello, can I order.."
Operator : "Can I have your multi purpose card number first, Sir?"
Customer: "It's eh..., hold.......... on......889861356102049998-45-54610"
Operator : "OK... you're... Mr Singh and you're calling from 17 Jalan Kayu. Your home number is 4094! 2366, your office76452302 and your mobile is 0142662566. Which number are you callingfrom now Sir?"
Customer: "Home! How did you get all my phone numbers?
Operator : "We are connected to the system Sir"
Customer: "May I order your Seafood Pizza..."
Operator : "That's not a good idea Sir"
Customer: "How come?"
Operator : "According to your medical records, you have high blood pressure and even higher cholesterol level Sir"
Customer: "What?... What do you recommend then?"
Operator : "Try our Low Fat Hokkien Mee Pizza. You'll like it"
Customer: "How do you know for sure?"
Operator : "You borrowed a book entitled "Popular Hokkien Dishes" fromthe National Library last week Sir"
Customer: "OK I give up... Give me three family size ones then, howmuch will that cost?" Operator : "That should be enough for your family of 10, Sir. Thetotal is $49.99"
Customer: "Can I pay by! credit card?"
Operator : "I'm afraid you have to pay us cash, Sir. Your credit cardis over the limit and you owe your bank $3,720.55 sinceOctober last year. That's not including the late payment charges onyour housing loan, Sir."
Customer: "I guess I have to run to the neighbourhood ATM and withdrawsome cash before your guy arrives"
Operator : "You can't Sir. Based on the records,you've reached yourdaily limit on machine withdrawal today."
Customer: "Never mind just send the pizzas, I'll have the cash ready. How long is it gonna take anyway?"
Operator : "About 45 minutes Sir, but if you can't wait you can alwayscome and collect it on your motorcycle..."
Customer: " What!"
Operator : "According to the details in my system, you own a Scooter,... registration number 1123..."
Customer: " ????"
Operator : "Is there anything else Sir?"
Customer: "Nothing... by the way... aren't you giving me that 3 free bottles of cola as advertised?"
Operator : "We normally would Sir, but based on your records you'realso diabetic......."
Customer: mailto:#$$^%&$@$%^
Operator: "Better watch your language Sir. Remember on 15th July 1987 you were convicted of using abusive language on a policeman...?"
Customer: [Faints]...

3 comments:

  1. now dats service delux!!!

    ReplyDelete
  2. exactly!

    quite awesome but i'm afraid what will happen to every humankind!

    ReplyDelete
  3. WTF

    If these things happen.. we're gonna kill the system and bomb all credit card companies.. including all pizza hut call centers. how's that for a nosy stupid deluxe service. And it's gonna be like "V for Vendetta" meets "Fight Club", (great movies, by the way).

    Happy Sunday everyone!

    ReplyDelete

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